The other night I was having dinner with my dad, sister niece and nephew, to celebrate Ethan (my nephew) turning lucky legs 11.
Over a bottle of sparkling we mulled over the idea of which high school Ethan should attend since the catchment area in which they live is a non-option!
I won’t mention the area but lets just say the kids who attend the local high school are not the sorts that we feel would “pull Ethan up in life” if you get my drift.
With that said, the only option for my sister was having to move house around the corner to be in the catchment area for the better school. Hence the reason why investors should be buying in good school catchment areas!!
I suggested moving out of the area altogether and as soon as the words left my mouth my sister was justifying why this was definitely not on the cards.
“ETHAN WOULD LOSE ALL HIS FRIENDS” SHE CLAIMED.
Now considering the boy is 11, I have no doubt he will have an abundance of opportunities to make NEW friends, especially since he’s a funny, class clown type.
The ones who ALWAYS attract a crowd of friends at school.
But the question is, will all these school friends even BE AROUND long term? So why the heck are we making decisions about Ethan’s life based on them?
How many primary school or high school friends are YOU still best buds with?
SADLY FOR ME, THE ANSWER IS 0. NO, HANG ON, 1.
One who lives an eight hour drive away who I see probably once every 5 years!
So where am I headed with all this?
It took me almost a decade being OUT of school to be comfortable and okay with the fact that the friends you have at school rarely stay in your life for the long haul.
And if they do, its either you’re soul mates of some sort and it’s meant to be, or the friendship is well passed its used by date. It’s just no one wants to let go.
I HAD A FRIEND LIKE THIS. MY BEST FRIEND IN FACT.
We hung on for way too long and it was only when I realised she actually WASN’T happy for my success that I had to cut the tie.
So why make decisions based on THEM when in ten years time (or even less) they probably won’t be in your life, or if they are, will they be adding significant value to it?
Will they be there, supporting your growth and being a positive influence in your life on your journey to becoming the person you truly want to be?
AS YOU ALL KNOW, I’M A HUGE ADVOCATE OF KEEPING POSITIVE INFLUENCES AROUND. FRIENDS INCLUDED.
This means cutting those friends who no longer serve your very best interests, making decisions in life based on where YOU want to head, not because the crowd is going that way, and learning to stand alone, independently on your own two feet without having the need to seek validation from anyone, friends and family included!
So if you really want the life you dream of, then I suggest taking some time out to think about what it truly is YOU want out of life.
DON'T BE INFLUENCED BY WHAT OTHERS ARE DOING.
Their station in life is probably completely different to yours and each and every one of us have our own journey to experience.
Allowing yourself to blindly follow in the footsteps of your friends because you’re scared to be alone probably means you’re missing out on all the great things that are destined for YOU!
Don’t be afraid to follow your own path and remember that REAL, genuine friends will support you no matter what you do. And heck, if those people happen to be the ones you met at school, then that is extra awesome.
Long standing friendships are something I have struggled with my whole life, but if you’re blessed to have these people around for the long haul, and they’re doing nothing but supporting you and pulling you up, then I’m happy for you.
I do have a friend who is in a completely different space to me, but when we get the chance to catch up, it’s like we never left each other’s side.
We laugh, compare notes, and share our respective stories. What I love is our chats are of great entertainment value since our stories are so different!
This ADDS to the friendship!
SHE RESPECTS WHERE I'M AT, AND I DO THE SAME. THIS IS HOW IT SHOULD LOOK (AND FEEL).
Once you learn to stand independently from your friends, only then I believe, are you able to really move forward in your own quest and attract the RIGHT people into your life.
Oh, and those school friends we talked about?
They’ll be just fine. Whether they’re in your life or not.
You’ll be chatting to them at your next high school reunion about how you’re loving life and super successful.